 (Tijs van Leur / Unsplash) An abuser won’t exchange vulnerable intimacy for vulnerable intimacy. There’s no dance of mutual self-giving in an abusive relationship. He may share some things about himself, but when you really think about what he said, likely you’ll come to realize his words had no depth.
Even though, during the love-bombing stages of the relationship, he seemed to be sharing pieces of his soul, he wasn’t. He was sharing fluff, half-truths, and speaking words he knew you wanted to hear—all in an effort to draw you closer to him in an emotional bond.
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AuthorI'm Jenny duBay, a domestic abuse survivor and now advocate. My degree is in Christian theology with a concentration on spiritual direction, and my vocational emphasis is on helping those who have suffered from domestic abuse to heal and reclaim their true selves. 
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