So many of my Catholic readers are struggling with the possible end of their relationship and wondering about divorce and annulment. Because I've received so many requests about divorce vs. annulment, I thought I’d let an expert answer some of your questions.
I’m honoured that Msgr. Charles Pope has given me permission to re-print his article, “What is an Annulment and How Does it Differ From Divorce?”
Love is often misunderstood -- and over-used -- in today's world. It's not unusual for people to declare that they love chocolate, or a sunny day after a long winter of storms and snow. But what does love mean when it comes to another person, and how can we love authentically?
Without engaging in a discussion on the various types philosophical of love -- eros (romantic), phileo (friendship),
and agapé (spiritual, sacrificial) — I wish to focus in this post on our most intimate relationships in regards to the necessity of detached love.
What does “detached love” mean? Aren’t we supposed to be emotionally bonded to our loved ones?
Marriage--as God intended--is about mutual self-giving. It's a waltz between partners, the balancing of strengths and opposites, weaknesses and complementariness. Sure, partners might step on each other's toes during the decades of this loving dance, yet all issues are resolved with authentic apology and open communication.
At least this is how marriage should be.
Yet when self-giving is one-sided—as it is in all abusive relationships—a corruption of God’s intentions takes place. This is a form of evil, a desecration of the gift of self. How can we heal from this trauma? How can we move forward?
I feel so blessed when my readers contact me with questions, concerns and comments.
However, since I now receive so many messages, I’ve decided to begin featuring Q&A as a regular feature of my articles. If you have any topics you’d like addressed, please let me know. And don’t worry—I won’t ever use your real name or identifying information.
Jenny duBay, Trauma-Informed Christian life coach.