At this point in history we're all familiar with isolation, but what some people don't realize is that isolation is a powerful and effective tactic also commonly used by domestic abusers.
At this point in our strange, globally-mandated lives, isolation is likely no stranger to any of us. There are uncanny similarities to what we’re all going through due to virus fears compared to someone in a domestically abusive relationship. Even so, isolation takes on a vastly more complex level when instigated by an intimate partner. In domestic situations, isolation is not only a negative situation imposed upon us by an outside force, but paradoxically it also becomes a comfortable and habitual—if dangerous—friend.
Isolation becomes a comfortable and habitual false friend.
An abuser isolates his target for several reasons, all of which boil down to one main intention—coercive control so as to manipulate his target into submission. This is accomplished in various ways.
The excessive jealousy of an abusive personality gives him a suspicious, anger-filled need to frequently check up on his victim when she’s out of his physical grasp. He hides his true motives behind an ineffective mask of “I love you” and “I just want to be sure you’re safe,” leading a victim to feel cherished and protected. She’s blind-sided into submission, not realizing that this sort of “protection” isn’t only false, but is potently dangerous to her wellbeing.
I'm Jenny duBay, a domestic abuse survivor and now advocate. My degree is in Christian theology with a concentration on spiritual direction, and my vocational emphasis is on helping those who have suffered from domestic abuse to heal and reclaim their true selves.